[Drivingforfun]

I remember an advanced driving instructor saying it's unnecessary to slow down very much when driving over railway lines

I went over one and gave myself and passengers a bit of a shock, then remembered he actually said cattle grids, not railway lines

[olduser]

I once took the passenger seat and door of a Mini to put a large electric motor in to drive 4 miles to deliver it to a carrier's depot, the motor weighed about 1 ton.

The background was
I was called out middle of the night to a factory breakdown, this motor had failed and needed to be rewound, the repairers were 25 miles away in Hull.

I had a smaller motor but this would only allow the factory to limp on rather than run.
The repairers could do a 24 hr job but how to get it there?

A local carrier were unable to collect until the following day but if I could get it to their depot within an hour the motor could be put on the overnight delivery to Hull, and being last on, it would be first off.

The only transport I had was my Mini.

So, off came the door, out came the seat, and in went the motor on some timbers to spread the load.
Life being what it is, I was stopped by a very puzzled policeman, of course when asked, I had no idea of the motor's weight but I had put it's seat belt on.
I think he wasn't sure what motoring law I was breaking if any or perhaps I was nicking the motor, he tried radioing the nick but no help.

In the end I suggested he could follow me, I could hardly make a dash for it, I could deliver the motor, then we could sort out the legal side.

By the time we got there, and unloaded the car, he decided it would be simpler to forget it, phew.

The car was OK, a bit of paint off the floor and cross member under the seat, and the hoist chain chipped paint off the rain gutter over the door, nothing that sandpaper, and rattle cans wouldn't fix.

Did the company say thanks?
Of course not.

[Rolebama]

Driving through Ashdown Forest at 2am, I thought deer's eyes in the mist were cats-eyes on the road. Luckily(?) there was a ditch we got stuck in before we hit the trees. A passing lorry driver had a rope, and towed us back onto the road. Only real damage was to my pride.

[TC1474]

Back in the day, traffic cops (well in my force anyway) used to have a personal issue patrol car (or motorcycle if you were a full time rider), the idea being that we treated it with far more respect as it was the tool of our job, and to be honest it worked as we took pride as if it was our own personal car.

Anyway, I had not long taken delivery of a brand spanking 4.2 Jag. It was lovely and it really stood out and made people think twice before trying t out gun me.

This particular evening, it was late and it was dark, I got involved in a pursuit of a stolen vehicle and it was leading us a merry dance all over the place but the driver clearly knew the area. I had no difficulty in staying with him, I was just conscious that some of the back roads he was heading down were a bit narrow with parked vehicles on both sides.

Blues and two's were on so everyone could see or hear that we were in close proximity, my partner was on commentary so all the evidence was being recorded (this is prior to video evidence) when suddenly the bandit vehicle turned sharp right and disappeared down this country lane. My partner said "We can follow no problem" so being a team I agreed and went for the hole where I last saw the bandit when I suddenly heard this sickening grinding of metal being bent and saw each wing of my lovely new Jag being peeled back like a banana skin.

The moral was don't try and fit a 6' wide Jag down a 5' opening (not exact figures but I am sure you get my drift)

To rub salt into the wound, car had to be recovered, of course that stood out like a sore thumb as all the yobs and drunks pointed their finger at my embarrassment which also dented my pride and ego, and to make matters worse, I had to use the office hack of the old spare Mk1 3.0 Granada whilst my car was being repaired (which to be fair was no hardship as my own personal car at the time was a Mk1 Granny) and we never did catch the little sh1t who started the incident in the first place.

Suffice to say, I was a lot more cautious the next time.

There have been a few more moments which I might share with you in due course 😉

[Rolebama]

I had a Morris Oxford for a while where I used to live. I used to park it in the back garden on a concrete shed base. Ourselves and our neighbours agree to take out the dividing fence between our properties and they also parked their cars in their back garden. My brothers and their sons had some kind of falling out so they built solid fences at the garden entrances, with gates for the cars. I found that I could nudge our gate open with the car, and then close it afterwards.
On this one occasion, I came home as usual on the Friday evening on leave, and decided I had had enough of this foolishness. I chose to take out the gate and fence in one fell swoop, and aimed for the gate post. What I had thought to be a 4" wooden post turned out to be 4" square steel section. Wrote the car off.
Good news was I replaced it with a Mk 1 Humber Sceptre - a much nicer car.